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Welcome to My Official Web Page!

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Jerk Store

My apologies to those of you who don't watch Seinfeld- I might have seen every episode and thrown a party at my house when the last episode aired.

Anyway, there's an episode where George's co-worker notices him stuffing himself with shrimp cocktail and remarks: "Hey George, the ocean called; they're running out of shrimp." Poor George doesn't think of a retort until after he's walked away.

His comeback?

"The jerk store called, they're running out of you!"

Yeah! Take that!

So this is an informal poll. I always proofread what I write, be it an email, blog post, or even a comment. And while I'm obviously not running around insulting people online, I'm constantly finding things I would change after it's too late.

In one of his books (can't remember which one), Barack Obama wrote that years after his book was published, he still cringes at awkward sentences he wishes could be changed. I know that will be me once Hatshepsut gets published- I'll never be able to read it without the Jerk Store effect.

What about you? Do you suffer from Jerk Store Syndrome?

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Tough Alaska Girl- Right...

I was lazy yesterday.

It was a gorgeous day and I decided to sit outside and soak up the sun before we went camping. My daughter got tired of playing in the sprinkler and ran around to the front door as I flipped over to my stomach to sun my back (trying in vain to avoid an Alaska tan). I turned and looked over by the BBQ just in time to see our neighbor's black lab poke his head past the house.

"What the heck?" I thought to myself. "How did Shadow get over the fence?"



Holy expletive!

Yeah, it wasn't Shadow. My backyard visitor was a black bear. Not a huge one, but still- a bear is a bear. My hubby snapped the picture after I ran into the house, scooping up my daughter and screaming like a banshee.

Now, I pride myself on being a tough Alaska girl. I live in the woods on a mountain and while I've seen bears in the wild before, it was always from a car or looking outside as one meandered through my dad's yard. But I've never been ten feet away from one without some protective surface between me and Mother Nature. I kind of like it that way, at least when Mother Nature has big claws and sharp teeth.

I always thought I'd be cool if I confronted a bear, wave and yell at it like they tell you to. But now I know that when confronted with something that has the capability to eat me I just run like a bat out of hell and swear like a sailor.

Yeah, I'm cool like that.

So next time I'm writing about some wild animal chasing one of my characters I have first-hand experience to draw from (okay, so the bear didn't chase me- whatever). Write what you know, eh?

Sunday, June 20, 2010

200 Follower Award Extravaganza!

*breaks out in an Egyptian happy dance*

I've reached 200 followers! And I'm giving out a boatload of awards in honor of all you frabjous people reading this! As always, these are no-pressure awards (I know some of you don't do awards and that's A-OK) and I'm breaking the rules (mostly because I've been hoarding these and have forgotten the requirements).


Shannon O'Donnell at Bookdreaming gifted me with this lovely Happiness 101 award. I love butterflies- there was a big yellow one that kissed my daughter today. So I'm passing this along to blogs that make me happy.

Amalia at Good to Begin Well, Better to End Well knows a whole lot about mythology!
Aubrie at Flutey Words always makes me smile.




Next is the Awesomesauce Award, given to me by Stina Lindenblatt at Seeing Creative and Julie Dao at Silver Lining. The following blogs totally rock because they are all bloggers with books coming out soon!

Gary Corby at A Dead Man Fell From the Sky writes historical mysteries set in ancient Greece. The Pericles Commission comes out in October 2010. I've already pre-ordered my copy!
Samuel Park @ Daily Pep For Writers has an amazing sounding book- This Burns My Heart- coming out in June 2011.




The next award is the Beautiful Blogger Award, a gift from Disgruntled Bear, Laurel at Laurel's Leaves and Janet Johnson. I'm sending this to bloggers who have, well... beautiful blogs.

Tricia O'Brien at Talespinning writes some of the most beautiful poetry with the most gorgeous photos to go with them.
Cynthia Reese is donating a portion of the proceeds from her book, The Baby Wait, to two different charities benefiting Chinese orphans. That's definitely beautiful.




The A is for Awesome Award was sent my way by VR Barkowski and is going to blogs I've just discovered.

Nicole MacDonald at Damsel in a Dirty Dress has a killer blog name. And she's a Kiwi!
Mason Canyon at Thoughts in Progress does some great author interviews that are super interesting!




Finally, the Versatile Blogger was given to me by Amanda Saban at That Unpublished Writer and is finding a new home with some nifty-neato bloggers.

Lydia Kang at The Word is My Oyster is superwoman: mom, wife, daughter, sister, doctor, and writer. All I can say is "Wow."
Kathi at Kathi's Writing Nook does some great interviews as well as some thought-provoking writing posts.


That's it folks- Happy Monday!

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Hate Mail



Dear Present Participles,

I've never written hate mail before, but my last post was about attempting something new. So I'm trying my hand at hate mail.

I hate you.

You are like the mucus in a Mucinex commercial, but even less appealing. And you've ingratiated yourself with my manuscript. Why did no one ever tell me how evil you are?

Yes, I know Hatshepsut fell for you. Hard. But that relationship is over. OVER! I will cut you out no matter how much it makes me bleed. Or her. Or anyone, really.

Hit the road, Present Participles. You're not wanted around these parts.

Cheers!
Stephanie

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Facing My Fears- With Tiramisu



It's a dreary, blustery day in Alaska. I'm worried summer might pass us by this year.

So what did I do today for the sheer pleasure of brightening my day? I made tiramisu from scratch. I haven't had any yet- it's still chilling in the fridge, but I tasted the frosting and it's pretty much nirvana.

I'll admit though- I was intimidated by this recipe. It was 2 full pages in my Williams-Sonoma book and uses 10 eggs. I love to bake, but I've put off tiramisu for a long time now because I wasn't sure it would turn out.

What the heck? That's no way to live! We can really only live if we manage to face our fears. I have a number of writing-related fears I'm facing up to as well. So I have a challenge for you today.

Try something new.

I don't care what it is. Change a tire by yourself, bake a cake, or do something scary in your writer-life. You never know, you just might surprise yourself.

What will you do today?

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Insanity



We writers are insane.

We pour our blood and tears into our work and then send it out to the world, often experiencing soul-crushing rejections.

And yet we persevere and keep going. Only further proving that we're crazy.

Some of us talk to people no one else can see. Others have crazy maps all over their writing desk, (akin to Russell Crowe in A Beautiful Mind). Some may need to bang their heads against the wall from time to time.

Welcome to the insanity, friends. Pull up a chair in my nice padded room. If you're cold I've got a nice jacket you can borrow, one with extra long sleeves.

It's too late to turn back.


Demotivator poster from www.Despair.com.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Zen 101- Success



Success if not found in what you have achieved, but rather in who you have become.

Think back to where you were as a writer one year ago.

I was frantically trying to finish my first novel before I ran out of inspiration. Again. I hadn't started revising. I hadn't sent it out to betas.

Now I'm working on Book #2. And querying.

I feel successful.

What about you? Where were you a year ago?


Photo from David Zinger.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

ACK! Killer Clowns & Ruined Scenes!

Okay, so I don't like clowns. But I posted about them at Secret Archives of the Alliterati.

Oh yeah, and I might have included some info on how to avoid ruining your scenes. You know, something educational AND scary people with painted faces who threaten to kill you if you don't give their big, red nose back.

Yeah, I had that dream once.

Anyway, check it out!

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Zen 101- Destiny



You can look... and you will find it.
You can not look... and you will find it.
That which is yours will surely come to you.


It just might take a really flipping long time.

I love this quote because it reminds me of finding my husband. Neither he or I were looking for a relationship when we stumbled across each other as tour directors on a bus in Alaska. He was carrying a book so I thought he must be smart. And then I found out that even though he wore really goofy shoes, he was also cute and funny. Things just worked out the way they were supposed to.

I'm now applying this attitude to being published. I had it in my head that if I worked hard enough- if I revised enough and sent out enough query letters- I would automatically land my dream agent and get published. Don't get me wrong- I still think Edison was onto something when he talked about 99% perspiration and 1% inspiration.

But I think that 1% inspiration might be better named as luck or destiny.

So wherever you are in this process, keep plugging away. Write that extra page today, do the extra journaling, start that next revision, and send another query letter.

But know that what's meant to happen will happen. But only when it's ready.

And yes, it might take a long time. A really, really, really long time.

But it will happen.

Sunday, June 6, 2010

Zen 101- Patience



Watch water drop onto the rock beneath it. One drop does nothing, but many drops over time create a hole in the rock. Such is the power of patience.

I know many of us writers struggle with our lack of patience. So many things are out of our control- getting sick while typing that first draft, waiting for beta reader responses, checking the inbox a gazillion times a day to hear back from agents and editors.

Why do we endure all this?

We love to write. Most of us would be miserable without our writing. I know I would. So take a deep breath and remember, the Word document will still be there tomorrow. The email in your inbox won't disappear if you don't check it every fifteen minutes.

Just relax.

Easier said than done, eh?



Photo from Musical Footsteps.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Zen 101



Okay guys, I'm about to go all Zen on you.

The last few weeks in Writing-Land have been a roller coaster ride, one filled with loop-de-loops and stomach curdling drops. I'm not a huge fan of roller coasters- I prefer the Ferris Wheel to the Zipper.

Like a little sign, my daughter was playing with a box and found some old Zen cards I'd forgotten about. After college I had a job I hated and would carry some of the cards in my pocket to remind me to find peace and happiness in every situation.

I need those reminders right now.


Understand that the journey is as important as the destination. Enjoy every moment, and live fully.


We all want to be published, but right now I need to appreciate the growth I've made as a writer over the last year, month, week, and even day. I've completed a novel, am about to finish another, and am currently foxholed in the query trenches. It's a struggle to remember the journey as the most important thing, but that's my new mantra.

What about you? What do you struggle with as a writer? I've got a whole smorgasbord of Zen sayings so if you tell me, I'm pretty sure I can help sprinkle us with a little peace next week. And maybe even the following week.

Have a lovely weekend!

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

I Really Love to Spell



So one of my goals in life it to turn my daughter into a total nerd. Okay, maybe not a Star-Trek-toting, head-gear-wearing nerd (yes, that describes me in school), but at least a nerd. Reason? High school may suck for the dorks, but they're the ones who are successful in school and do well once they graduate.

So I've been teaching the three-year-old monkey to read. And she's doing a pretty darn good job. She's got a sentence she reads every night before bed and we work on words every day. She's also well on her way to Dork-dom because she likes to turn everything into a song. It's like living in a Broadway musical.

Here was the song she was singing in the bath tub tonight:

I really love to spell,
S-E-P-L-L.
I really love to spell,
S-E-P-L-L!


And the munchkin just doesn't see the irony. We'll have to work on that one.