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Welcome to My Official Web Page!

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Paperback Writer

I'll be querying HATSHEPSUT: FEMALE PHARAOH in February and I've got a darn good pitch. Several of you made suggestions last time when I posted the query here and the letter is finally done. The only thing that would make it more sparkly would be glitter and I'm pretty sure Nathan, Kristin, and Janet wouldn't appreciate glitter.

For those of you querying, getting ready to query, or perfecting that all-important letter, I have found a fabulous query we could all seek to emulate.

Dear Sir or Madam, will you read my book?
It took me years to write, will you take a look?
It's based on a novel by a man named Lear
And I need a job, so I want to be a paperback writer.

It's the dirty story of a dirty man
And his clinging wife doesn't understand.
His son is working for the Daily Mail,
It's a steady job but he wants to be a paperback writer.

It's a thousand pages, give or take a few,
I'll be writing more in a week or two.
I can make it longer if you like the style,
I can change it round and I want to be a paperback writer.

If you really like it you can have the rights,
It could make a million for you overnight.
If you must return it, you can send it here
But I need a break and I want to be a paperback writer.

John, Paul, George, & Ringo

Okay, so I've heard the song a gazillion times, but I've never paid attention to the lyrics. Who knew the Beatles could write such a lame (albeit funny) query letter? Here's for those of you who want to jam to the song.

And if you haven't already, go write your query. It can't be worse than what the Beatles wrote, right? :)