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Welcome to My Official Web Page!

Thursday, December 31, 2009

Books, How I Love Thee


2010 will be born in about four-and-a-half hours so I should be out partying, but I have a three-year-old. Our wild and crazy New Year consists of footy jammies and Snow White on VHS.

And a syrah and chocolate covered pretzels for Mommy later.

Many of you are doing the 100 book challenge for 2010 and I'm jealous. I only set goals for myself for the coming year that are manageable and I simply don't think I could tackle that many books in a year. Pre-kiddo, absolutely. But Crayolas and Fancy Nancy books have taken a bite out of my personal reading time.

I thought I would post a list of the books I want to read in the first few months of 2010 and the books I recall reading in 2009. I didn't keep a list this year so I'm going to miss some, but such is life.

Books Finished in '09

The Lightening Thief- Rick Riordan
The Sea of Monsters- Rick Riordan
The Titan's Curse- Rick Riordan
The Battle of Labyrinth- Rick Riordan
The Last Olympian- Rick Riordan
Shiver- Maggie Stiefvater
Evermore- Alyson Noel
Blue Moon- Alyson Noel
Twilight- Stephenie Meyer
New Moon- Stephenie Meyer
Eclipse- Stephenie Meyer
Breaking Dawn- Stephenie Meyer (My brain cells committed suicide on this one. Sorry, Stephenie!)
Nefertiti- Michelle Moran
The Illuminator- Brenda Rickman Vantrease
Dead Until Dark- Charlaine Harris
Club Dead- Charlaine Harris
Living Dead in Dallas- Charlaine Harris
Life of Pi- Yann Martel
The Poisonwood Bible- Barbara Kingsolver
The Memory Keeper's Daughter- Kim Edwards
Founding Brothers- Joseph Ellis
Water for Elephants- Sara Gruen
I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings- Maya Angelou
The Time Traveler's Wife- Audrey Niffenegger
The Old Man and the Sea- Ernest Hemingway
The Lovely Bones- Alice Sebold
Killer Angels- Michael Shaara
Confucius Lives Next Door- T.R. Reid
Kafka By the Shore- Haruki Murakami (This one made my head hurt.)

There were also a few books that I started, but never finished. The Pillars of the Earth (I got 400 pages into that one before I had to put it down. Sigh.), Three Cups of Tea, The Widow of the South, and Olive Kitteridge are all languishing on my shelf.


Books To Read in '10
Hush, Hush- Becca Fitzpatrick
March- Geraldine Brooks
A Certain Slant of Light- Laura Whitcomb
A Fearful Symmetry- Audrey Niffenegger
The Spanish Bow- Andromeda Romano-Lax
The Zookeeper's Wife- Diane Ackerman
Traveling With Pomegranates- Sue Monk Kidd & Ann Kidd Taylor
Delilah- India Edghill
The Lost Symbol- Dan Brown
A Strenuous Life- Theodore Roosevelt
The Wilderness Warrior: Theodore Roosevelt & The Crusade For America- Douglas Brinkley (I've started this one, but it's 817 pages in teeny-tiny font.)
Hotel on the Corner of Bitter & Sweet- Jamie Ford (started this one tonight and am loving it!)


Do you have any other books I should add to my pile? We're building new bookshelves sometime soon so I need more books! (Like I need a hole in my head, right?)

Happy New Year!

The Silver Lining


2010 is almost upon us. 2009 was a rather placid year for me, but I have a hunch that 2010 is going to be a roller coaster ride. I typically shy from drama, but I think I can handle a bipolar year.

When times get tough it's nice to find a little silver lining, something to rely on as a pick-me-up. When I'm stressed I tend to do one of the following:

1. Yoga. Yay for Pigeon Pose! And Plow!
2. Run. This especially helps when I'm mad.
3. Read. There's nothing like living in an alternate world for a few hours to bring me to my happy place.
4. Read blogs. This is especially effective at work. Shhh! Don't tell!

Shannon recently awarded me The Silver Lining Award and I'd like to pass it along to a few blogs that always make me smile. This is a no pressure award- pass along if you choose, acknowledge, or do nothing. There's more awards to come in the future!

1. Terresa at The Chocolate Chip Waffle is like a ray of sunshine in the blogosphere. She can seriously work some magic with words.
2. Matt at Free the Princess does some awesome steampunkery and has also allowed me to be an evil dictator. That makes me oh so happy!
3. K.M. Kriddle at C'MERE is downright hilarious. Her posts are in picture form and they make me snort various liquids up my nose.
4. Bane of Anubis is a no-holds-barred kind of guy. I love his brutal honesty.
5. Jade at Jade Hears Voices is an Aussie with spunk. And she digs archaeology! (Oh, yes, that pun was on purpose!)

Happy New Year to everyone! I hope 2010 brings all you whatever your heart desires!

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Greetings From Seattle

We've been having a lot of fun playing around- who knew the thirties could feel so great? It's supposed to be down to single digits when we get back to Alaska. Sigh.

I'm anticipating finishing Rick Riordan's Percy Jackson series tomorrow on the plane, provided that the three-year-old monkey cooperates. I'm going to be sad- those books are awesome and I don't want them to end. If you haven't read them, you must. Yes, that's a direct order. For some reason I feel like JeanLuc Picard saying that which is totally unrelated, but whatever. Make it so.

Why do I love these books? The voice. Voice will make or break your novel. It's what makes one novel shine and another fall flat. Another book that I loved for voice is Sue Monk Kidd's The Secret Life of Bees. I adore characters with quippy (might have made up a new word there, but I don't care- just don't try to use quippy to win Scrabble) little one-liners and great zingers. Both of these books (well, really, six since the Percy Jackson series has five books) are written in first person and have oodles of zingy internal dialogue. I've tried to incorporate zingers (I just like that word today) into HATSHEPSUT, but it's a little different since it's written in third person.

So, two questions for you today. First, what books have you read with phenomenal voice? And second, do you like to read/write in first or third person. Or do you care either way?

Also, Shannon is having a killer giveaway contest on her fabulous blog, Book Dreaming. You should enter if you haven't already!

Sunday, December 27, 2009

Query Help!

Many of you have already read and commented on my query over at the Public Query Slushpile, but I'm posting it here one last time because I wanted to poll all of you regarding one sticking point.

I've been looking to find another successful female ruler before Hatshepsut- there are no confirmed prior Egyptian female Pharaohs who didn't plunge the nation into chaos- and I can't find any female rulers from Mesopotamia, Babylon, Sumeria, etc. Should I include something about Hatshepsut being the first successful female ruler in history or is that just the history teacher in me getting all excited at something being the first? I ask this because I want this book to come across as marketable and as a history nerd, this little factoid makes Hatshepsut even more cool than she already is. (It's hard to imagine that's even possible!)

Here's the query- any and all comments are helpful as I'll be querying in February.

---------------------

Dear SuperFab Agent,

The gods taunt those they love most. And they absolutely adore Hatshepsut.

When her father dies, Hatshepsut is forced to marry her hippo of a half-brother to secure his royal claim as Pharaoh. She becomes the real power behind Egypt’s crown, but as a woman, remains relegated to the shadows of the Horus Throne. The Pharaoh’s death can’t come soon enough.

Her brother dies three years into his reign and Hatshepsut becomes regent to her two-year-old stepson, launching Egypt into its golden age. Then she does the unthinkable. Amid foreign wars and a palace coup, Hatshepsut proclaims herself Pharaoh of Egypt. Tormented by her love of a commoner and cursed with personal tragedies, Hatshepsut will face a choice: family or eternal glory.

HATSHEPSUT: FEMALE PHARAOH is historical fiction complete at 90,000 words.

With the recent discovery of her mummy, Hatshepsut has been showcased in National Geographic, Smithsonian Magazine, and the Discovery Channel over the past three years. As a history teacher, I have traveled to Egypt twice to better tell Hatshepsut’s story and am currently at work on my second novel set in ancient Egypt.

Thank you for your consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.


------------------------

There you have it! Should I include something about her being the first successful female ruler or does it even matter? Also, I won't be around until New Year's Eve-ish as I'll be playing in Seattle. So if I don't see you all before then, have a fabulous and safe New Year!

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Merry ChristmaHannuKwanzSolstice!


Okey dokey- I'm off for the next few days to immerse myself in holiday cheer. (Read: Cleaning and baking until I drop.) I'll be back for a day or two after Christmas and then I'm off to play in Seattle for a few days. Woohoo!

I wish you all a very Merry Christmas! Or any other holidays you might celebrate- I forgot to mention Solstice yesterday. Yay for returning daylight! See you soon!

Monday, December 21, 2009

Confucius Says... 2010 is Going to be Great!


I have a thing with fortune cookies. I rarely eat Chinese food and when I do, I like to think my fortune cookies will come true. And really, wouldn't it just be wrong for a fortune wrapped in sugary goodness to not come true?

So last week I got another one- I think that makes three this year.

You will find your horizons suddenly broadened.

Hmmm... In the short-term, I'm getting some killer suggestions from beta readers, definitely broadening my horizons. In the long-term...

Well, I think getting an agent and having HATSHEPSUT published would broaden my horizons, don't you? Sometimes I set goals half-heartedly, knowing they're not going to pan out and yet, not really caring. This is probably the first long-term goal that I know I'm going to meet despite the astronomical odds the universe has stacked against me. It's going to be a brutal year as I survive rejection after rejection, but I just have this feeling that by this time next year I'm going to have an agent. And hopefully a book deal.

What about you? Where will you be this time next year?

Sunday, December 20, 2009

Pucker Up- Let the Kissing Day Blogfest Begin!


I'm a hopeless romantic so there's no way I could resist the Kissing Day Blogfest. Here's my excerpt from HATSHEPSUT: FEMALE PHARAOH.




Senenmut didn’t move, but stood rigid as stone until Hatshepsut’s hand reached out to clasp his. The silence seemed to last forever, just the sound of their breath mingling with each inhale and exhale, their fingers interlaced. She wanted that flawless moment to last forever, the two of them standing on a precipice they could never return from, each aching for the other. She reached up, tracing the narrow white line that scarred his forehead. Senenmut’s resolve shattered, a groan escaping his lips.

When their lips touched, it was for a kiss as searing as the winds of a summer khamsin, leaving Hatshepsut breathless in its wake. Senenmut’s arms bound her to him, his hands wrapped in her hair as the kiss ravaged her willpower.

And yet, she was Queen of Egypt. This was treason.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

If I Were an Ancient God...

Yay! This week is finally over and I only have one class of tests left to grade!

*cue the heavens parting and angels singing*

My apologies for being sparse on the comments the past few days- finals almost killed me. But today I have a super awesome blog for you to peruse- Book Dreaming by Shannon O'Donnell. Her blog (and comments) are a buttery ray of sunshine when I log on every morning. And she loves books! And recommending them!

So today I'm going to recommend a book I'm not even done with. I recently plowed through The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver and Shiver by Maggie Stiefvater. Both were good, but missing that spark to make me fall in love with them.

The Lightening Thief by Rick Riordan sparks. A lot. It's middle grade AND is all about Greek mythology. Hello? Where the heck was this book when I was in middle school? Not only is it great for us mythology geeks, I mean, er... super awesome geniuses, but the main character, Percy Jackson is hilarious. The book has made me laugh out loud so many times I've lost count. You must read it.

So here's your random question of the day. Who is your favorite god in mythology? I always liked Athena because she's tough and super smart. And Isis, the Egyptian god of magic is pretty awesome too. Who do you like?

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Where in the World is Stephanie?

Your novel has been on the New York Times Bestseller List for twelve weeks now and HBO just called- they want to make your book(s) into a miniseries. It's going to win a lot of awards. Like a lot, a lot.

You could kick back and retire to your beach house, but you are driven to write another riveting tale, one that Steven Spielberg will kiss your feet to produce. With all your money you've decided to take a trip to do research for you next novel (after donating a sizable chunk to the charity of your choice and paying off all your bills). So you contact Laure Martone, today's featured blogger and travel guru, and get her advice on your dream locale.

I would take a trip to Angkor Wat. I have this story idea that's been rattling around in my head for a year now, but I only know the ending. It might take place in Tikal (where I got the inspiration), but it might take place in Cambodia. It needs ancient ruins from a civilization we know little about- a mysterious setting to capture the essence of the story.


And it helps to have monkeys. I like monkeys.

So, I'm going to Cambodia with my new-found riches. Where are you going?

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

P90X Ab Ripper? Rip This!

I love a little sarcasm, especially in my novels. So today my featured blogger is Bane of Anubis. Not only is he sarcastic, but he shares his name with the Egyptian god of the dead so he's a rockstar. And the other day he posted about P90X which was Twilight Zone-ish because I've been thinking of this post since Thanksgiving.

You see, my husband and I are both a tad competitive. He had mentioned this killer workout series called P90X and then one of our friends mentioned how hard it was and how it incorporated a lot of yoga. After struggling to find a sport I don't suck at, I finally discovered yoga in high school and I've been doing it for almost 12 years now. I'm a yoga superstar. (Not very Zen of me to brag, but whatever.) I've had my nose broken by a soccer ball, but I can hold Firefly until the cows come home.

So the night before Thanksgiving my husband mentions that he's been doing this P90X ab workout and it's a killer. Yada, yada, yada. Then he says it's only 15 minutes. So I say I bet I could do it. He scoffs.

Dude, I gave birth to our daughter naturally, no drugs. I can handle 15 minutes of pain. I tell him so and he just shakes his head with that obnoxious little smile that says, "I don't think so." So I make a bet with him that if I could do every single rep I could buy whatever I wanted on Black Friday.

Did I do every rep? Darn straight! So I bought myself a couple artsy shirts and a piece of stained glass from this nifty boutique I found on Black Friday, sans guilt.

I have one of those personalities where if someone tells me I can't do something I'm going to do everything in my power to prove them wrong, no matter how much it kills me. What? You say publishing is hard and trying to get my book printed is going to crush my soul? Bring it on, baby!

What about you? Do you rise to the occasion when challenged?

Monday, December 14, 2009

Shots Rang Out

Okay, I don't have a recommended blog for you today because my internet connection is all wonky and my links aren't working. Curses on the Internet gremlins!

However, I have something almost as good- Student Metaphors & Analogies!

*drum roll*

1. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.
2. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
3. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty Bag filled with vegetable soups.
4. Even in his last years, Grandpappy had a mind like a steel trap only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.
5. Shots rang out, as shots are known to do.

Do you have a favorite today? I love #4, but #5 makes me chuckle too.

And a word of caution: Watch out for the internet gremlins!

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Aussies and The Princess & The Frog

Every Australian I've ever met is tinged with a little crazy (they have to be to eat Vegemite) and so, without further ado, I bring you two new blogs from Down Under!

First, I love Gary Corby's blog simply because of the name: A Dead Man Fell From the Sky. The title comes from a portion of his Ancient Greek mystery due out this fall. I plan to be the first to preorder!

Second, Jade is a self-proclaimed crazy Aussie. Her blog is titled Jade Hears Voices and all of her posts make me laugh like a loon. Wait, do loons laugh? Hmmm...


And now let the serious blogging commence.

Saturday night my husband and I took the three-year-old monkey to see Disney's The Princess & The Frog. I honestly wasn't expecting much based on Disney's performance in the last decade- only their movies wedded to Pixar have been worth the price of the ticket.

But all I can say after seeing this one is wow. It was great! About halfway through I realized it was good and starting thinking about why this was better than say, Brother Bear. Here's what I came up with.

Setting- The movie is set in New Orleans and the bayous of Louisiana, both lending themselves to some great creative effects.
Stunning Effects- This was superb animation with vibrant effects, especially during the songs. They're like metaphors in a book, making a scene really pop.
Dialogue- The spoken lines were snappy, not a single one superfluous.
Humor- The movie was pretty hilarious. I just about died when some frog-hunters from the bayou popped up and one only had two fingers. Of course, these hicks from the sticks weren't the sharpest tools in the shed.
Antagonist- Dr. Facilier was evil and his song numbers were excellent. Of course, in typical Disney fashion he was pure evil, with no redeeming qualities.
Characters- Both Tiana and Prince Naveen were fleshed out, as close to 3D as you can get in an animated feature. I actually like Tiana the best out of all the Disney heroines. (See next bullet.) And the secondary characters were great, especially the almost two-hundred-year old, blind voodoo witch, Mama Odie.
Deeper Message- The message of the movie is to work hard (Tiana) and enjoy life (Naveen). It was refreshing to see a Disney heroine whose whole conflict wasn't her rebeling against her parents or searching for a man to save her.
Emotion- There was one scene toward the end that made me a little teary-eyed. And then I looked over to see my daughter crying. Dude, she's three! Yeah, Disney's that good.

So, if you're not adverse to kid's movies and you want a cute story, I highly recommend The Princess and the Frog. It's definitely one of my new favorites, ranking up there with Aladdin and Alice & Wonderland.

What's your favorite Disney movie?

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Friday Art Walk

From now until Christmas, I'm going to make an effort every day to highlight blogs I love. (Thanks for the idea, Tamika!) There might be a theme, there might be one, or two, or three blogs- I'm not setting any rules because I just want to have fun and give a shout out to some amazing sites I love to browse.

Today I have two, both with an artsy flair.

I am head over heels in love with the angels at Lisa at Scherer Art. I like to pretend I can paint, but this woman has talent! I adore Serena, the angel Lisa has offered up for the holidays, and the blue Madonna. I was literally drooling as I scoured her site to find out if they were available, but alas! It doesn't appear that they are.

My second favorite artsy blog has a tasty name and some gorgeous photos and poetry. I like to visit Terresa at The Chocolate Chip Waffle when I need creative inspiration. Her prose and poetry put mine to shame and recently she's done a fantabulous job with posts reminding the rest of us to appreciate the little things in life.

In keeping with Terresa's posts, I so very much appreciate some little things from today: a single kiss from my husband (we don't see each other on Thursdays), hugs from my daughter's little arms, dark chocolate sea salt covered cashews, and a glorious foggy sunset I could see in full from my mountain perch above the clouds.

What little things do you appreciate from your week?

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Student Analogies & Metaphors- Star Crossed Lovers Version

All right, it's time for your latest installment of Student Analogies & Metaphors! The last installment featured maggots in hot grease and poor, slow Phil. Today we have the romance version to make you snort out loud!

1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides compressed by a Thigh Master.
2. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
3. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
4. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 pm traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 pm at a speed of 35 mph.
5. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.


Two and five make me laugh out loud, but number three is disgustingly hilarious. Which one made you snort your coffee out your nose this morning?

Is that a pun? Hmmm...

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Practically Perfect in Every Way

Have you ever had to interview for a job and they ask you what your worst quality is? I was dumbfounded to be asked that at my first job interview. I'm here to sell myself and tell you just what a fabulous human being I am and make you believe that you'll rue the day you didn't hire me for this minimum wage job making sandwiches (oh yes, I was a sandwich artist) and you want me to tell you what I most suck at?

But I'm like a cat- I landed on my feet. (And I'm apparently full of cliches today. Just go with it.)

My greatest fault? I'm a perfectionist. Hard-core. If my house isn't spotless, I have issues. If there's a stack of papers waiting to be graded on my desk I become obsessed with getting through that pile as soon as possible. If there's a plot issue in my book it will haunt me until I find a solution.

All of these can be good things- no one is ever grossed out coming to my house, my students get feedback on their work as soon as is humanly possible, and I keep plugging away at my novel. But there are also a lot of drawbacks.

I can't relax. I have too much to do. Even my pile of books I want to read sit in their corner, taunting me with my failure to get to them. And I've noticed this nasty little trait is getting worse. I've only got three more years until I'm the age my mom was when she died. It's like a ticking time bomb, a constant reminder of all the things I want to do before I die.

Before you think I'm crazy (I am, but it's not certifiable. Yet.), I don't think I'm going to actually die in three years. I just always told myself I'd get the big stuff out of the way just in case I don't live to be 105 torturing my great-great-great-grandchildren by pulling my dentures out and chasing them around the house with my walker.

Anyways, what I think I'm trying to get at is that I have a great motivator to get my book done and travel the world, but it really doesn't mesh well with the perfectionist in me. I seriously need an extra five hours a day to accomplish everything I want to at any given time. Because it all has to be perfect. The first time.


So, do you have a trait that gets in the way of your writing? Or something strange that motivates you?

Monday, December 7, 2009

I'm It! So Just Hold Still...

This week may kill me. The week before finals is horrendous, the feeling a lobster has just before being dropped in the boiling pot of water. Seriously, what idiot assigns all these ridiculous projects and tests to my students?

Right...

So I'm quite thrilled that A Girl With One Eye has tagged me. Just that visual alone is enough to make me giggle in my sleep deprived state. I'm seriously wondering if drool will short out my laptop right now. And I'm tagging Matt, Amalia, and L.T. for this so the next time they need a blog post they'll have an easy out. Man, I'm so nice!

1. What's the last thing you wrote? What's the first thing you wrote that you still have?
I'm writing RELUCTANT QUEEN, but my last finished piece is HATSHEPSUT. I have my first grade journal where I wrote that I wanted to be a paleontologist. And I spelled it correctly. Yeah, 'cause I'm that awesome.
2. Write poetry?
Not so much.
3. Angsty poetry?
Negative, Ghostrider.
4. Favorite genre of writing?
Historical fiction. Duh. :)
5. Most annoying character you've ever created?
Thutmosis, Hatshepsut's brother-husband. He's a royal pain in the butt. (Tehehe... get it? Royal? 'Cause he's the Pharaoh! I really need some sleep.)
6. Best Plot you've ever created?
Well, I think the overarching plot for HATSHEPSUT is pretty good. But I borrowed from Sophocles, Shakespeare, and the Bible so I can't really take credit for it.
7. Coolest Plot twist you've ever created?
Ummm... I can't really say. It would give away one of the best scenes of the book. I'll just say it should make you cry. It makes me cry and I've read the sucker a gazillion times!
8. How often do you get writer's block?
I force myself to write every day, but every few months I struggle to get more than a page a day. But this week I'm taking a break to read. I need it.
9. Write fan fiction?
Not anymore. I used to at Panhistoria.
10. Do you type or write by hand?
Type. Unless I'm revising. Then I like to alternate so I can "grade." The teacher in me is trained to write with red ink.
11. Do you save everything you write?
Inadvertently. I'm OCD about saving my drafts and I have all of them. It's not to save what I cut, but just to make sure I don't lose anything if my computer crashes.
12. Do you ever go back to an idea after you've abandoned it?
Not yet.
13. What's your favorite thing you've ever written?
HATSHEPSUT. I have to admit that after this last revision I'm pretty proud of it. I hope this latest round of beta readers likes it! *crosses fingers*
14. What's everyone else's favorite story that you've written?
Not sure yet!
15. Ever written romance or angsty teen drama?
Nope. I'll leave that to Stephenie Meyer.
16. What's your favorite setting for your characters?
Egypt. As if you couldn't guess that.
17. How many writing projects are you working on right now?
Two- revising HATSHEPSUT and pounding out the first draft of RELUCTANT QUEEN. Pounding in slow motion, that is.
18. Have you ever won an award for your writing?
Not a real one.
19. What are your five favorite words?
Lackadaisical, plethora, myriad, frenetic, tempest
What character have you created that is most like yourself?
There are pieces of me in all my characters. Hatshepsut is very responsible and has a temper. She can also be sarcastic- some of my finer traits. And Nitokerty, my latest protagonist has traces of me at 21. That's a lot of fun! And a little scary too.
21. Where do you get ideas for your characters?
History. Herodotus. Non-fiction books.
22. Do you ever write based on your dreams?
Nope. My dreams are weird. Like the heffalump scene from Dumbo. If I ever have a character on PCP I'll know where to go for inspiration.
23. Do you favor happy endings?
No. I like my stories to have hope at the end, but they're not happy. I remember tragic scenes the most- Romeo & Juliet, Hamlet, The Kite Runner, The Secret Life of Bees. Life isn't always pretty- a novel that can wrench your guts is a powerful one.
24. Are you concerned with spelling and grammar as you write?
Heck yeah! And I hate finding typos. They remind me that I'm not perfect. Grrr...
25. Does music help you write?
Sometimes. I like to listen to Yo-Yo Ma. He rocks!
26. Quote something you've written. Whatever pops into your head.
As they continued down the palace corridors to the main hall where the wedding would take place, Senenmut’s mind wandered to Thutmosis. Revulsion poured over him at the thought of such a hippo bellying up to Hatshepsut in their marriage bed tonight. The dolt deserved some simpering peasant girl who would fawn over the spoiled prince and his royal blood. Instead, Thutmosis was going to receive one of the most intelligent women in all of Egypt, trussed up and served to him on a golden platter.

Sunday, December 6, 2009

A Lesson From the Three Little Pigs


My daughter loves the Three Little Pigs, so much so that I've even been treated to a re-enactment of the story in Home Depot's door department. Multiple times.

Something I noticed when reading her Disney version of the story is that the ending is watered down from what I remember as a kid. The big, bad wolf climbs down the chimney, touches the scalding water in the kettle and zips back up to the roof. He runs into the forest and the three little pigs never see him again. They all live happily ever after.

The Leap Frog version is even more sedate. In that one, the wolf goes down the chimney and simply doesn't like the water (it's not even hot this time) and leaves.

Excuse me? What the heck happened to the pigs cooking up the wolf and eating him? And since when did all three pigs get to live? In the version I remember Pig #1 and Pig #2 get eaten up, a tasty treat of ham and bacon for that naughty wolf.

When I was at Barnes & Noble the other day I checked some of their print versions just to make sure that the macabre side of me wasn't rewriting a children's classic. I wasn't. The old-school 70's versions end with Pig #3 as the sole survivor of the pig-wolf massacre.

And you know what? That's the version I like. I bought it for my daughter so now she has the full gamut of Three Little Pig endings.

So what does this have to do with writing? A little drama isn't a bad thing- we humans crave it. You just have to make sure you don't go overboard. If the Three Little Pigs had turned into cannibals and started eating each other I would have closed the book. I have to draw the line somewhere, right?


Do you have violence in your novel? How much? Which version of the Three Little Pigs do you like best?

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Care for a Brownie?


A while back I posted about rules we writers love to break. I really, really love sentence fragments. A lot.

But you know what? Writing is like baking brownies (I just pulled a fresh batch out of the oven and the house smells heavenly). You can make it from a mix, using a formula/recipe or you can do what I do and make it up as you go along.

But you know what?

If you forget the flour you're going to have a runny mess of goo in your pan. And if you leave out the chocolate chips your dessert is going to be bland. But if you add peppermint bark chips to the top those brownies going to be awesome.

A novel is the same way- there are rules you should probably follow. If you have a gazillion dialogue tags you're in trouble, just like if you OD'd on the salt. And if your pages are slathered with adverbs you may as well have left the thing in the oven for an extra hour. A prologue might make the first pages of your book flat, but without the wonderful gooeyness that even warm chocolate sludge still possesses.

I like breaking the occasional rule, but I know I need to follow some of them too. The one I decided to follow that still stings is axing my prologue. I loved it. I still love it. I still think it should be included, but I chopped it, hoping one day soon an agent will sign me and ask why there isn't a prologue for HATSHEPSUT: FEMALE PHARAOH. Then I can whip it out and we can all gush over how wonderful it is.

Are there any writing rules you've followed that were particularly painful?

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Yes, This Post Is About Squirrels

Most of us have a genre we feel most comfortable with. Some like historical fiction, some like middle grade, and others prefer fantasy. And there are others who aren't so sure, but are working it out.

We're like little squirrels, trying to find a nice comfy hole to burrow into. (I tried to figure out a way to work some nuts into that analogy, but it's just not working.) Regardless, we each have our own little niche. Sometimes we pop out and try a new hole, but it's usually on the same tree.

But sometimes there's this other tree that looks like it would be so much fun. Maybe it has extra high branches or a super-tasty stash of nuts (yay!). Maybe it even has a water slide.

Okay, maybe no water slides for the squirrels.

But it looks like it's too far to jump. We're not flying squirrels, after all.

My point is, there are genres out there that we don't write that look like fun, but for whatever reason we don't write them. I would love to write something contemporary and fill my manuscripts with hyperbole about Picasso (yes, that's a Picasso squirrel you're seeing) and metaphors about Twinkies. That just doesn't fly when you're writing ancient Egypt. But Egypt is my thing. The closest I could imagine coming out of my chosen niche would be to write about some other historical time period.

Do you have another genre you've always thought sounded like fun to write? Do you think you ever will?

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Maggots in Hot Grease

Most people hate Mondays. I hate Tuesdays. They're the longest day at work for me and also the day I have the most meetings. Teachers are busy people; we don't have time for meetings! Add to the mix a sore throat and my husband cutting his knuckle off (don't ask) and you've got a recipe for an exhausting day.

So I'm going to be lazy and post a few more Student Analogies and Metaphors because I could use the giggle and I'm hoping you can too.

1. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
2. He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
3. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM.
4. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan might just work.
5. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.

Doesn't everyone have experience frying maggots in hot grease? I know you were just waiting to find out where today's post title came from.

I'm particularly fond of #3. Which one made you laugh the most?